The Effects of Space Deprivation

Living Manhattan for prolonged periods of time makes you batty. You're constantly cramped in small spaces and having to fight crowds. Unless you're fortunate enough to have an unlimited supply of money or don't mind being deep in debt, your entire apartment is likely the size of a two car garage. Also, if you take public transportation, which most Manhattanites do, you'll likely ride in a subway car or bus smooshed up closer to the next person than you'd ever want to be. Seriously, I get closer to random subway/bus riders than I do my boyfriend on most days. If you grocery shop, the store isles will be so narrow that two carts trying to pass through will create a traffic jam. Although I'm very guilty of this, I get annoyed when someone decides to stop in the middle of the isle to look at store ads. No one can get through! The pet food isle really should be the designated place to do this.

This cramped culture hasn't completely obliterated all of my manners yet. I still say 'please' and 'thank you' when asking favors (e.g. 'Excuse me, please' instead of 'Move!'). But I have become more aggressive navigating through crowds and trying to secure a spot on the subway. I won't think twice about shoving the person in front of me to get into the subway car if I think it can be packed tighter to accomodate me. I'll also elbow my way through crowds if I'm in a hurry to get somewhere. I've learned that these are things you just have to do if you don't want to continually be shoved to the back of the crowd. I don't really take it personally when people do this to me also, and they do.

The pushing and shoving are understandable because there is no space, and people do have to get places. But the one thing that irks me is all other forms of rude subway behavior. I almost started laughing when I heard this conversation on the subway last night:

(Girl pushes guy in front of her so that she can get onto the subway)

Guy: No need to push. There's plenty of room.
Girl: I'm sorry.
Guy: There's lots of room here. You pushed me.
Girl: I said I was sorry.
Guy: Fine, just don't do it again.

(Girl is slightly annoyed that the guy is being such an ass about it and makes a face with her friend to vent)
(About two stops later when the girl's friend leaves...)

Guy (to girl who glances over at him): Do you have something to say to me?
Girl: No.
Guy: Stop glaring at me. You [expletive] pushed me. Dike!
Girl: You're dead on.
Guy: Stop [expletive] talking to me! Dike!
Girl: You're just angry that I don't like men.
Guy: Oh, shut the [expletive] up!

Brief silence...

Guy: Dike!

These strangers were seriously 30+ and having this argument.

And then this morning:

I'm waiting at the entrance of the L train as it empties out. I step into the train and find myself a seat. Then:

Girl standing above me (rolls her eyes at me and then speaks to her sitting friend): I could have taken it from her, and I should have!

Ugh! I really wasn't in the mood to endure her tantrum, especially when there were empty seats around.

Me (getting up to move to another seat): I'm sorry. Take it.

Girl: No, no. Really, I'm fine. It's fine. You don't need to get up.

Argh! Now you want to be polite? One of my pet peeves is when people whine and bitch about what they don't have and then refuse it when it's offered to them. The train moved for about 10 seconds before it hit the next stop after which the girl got out of my seat and exited.